No Pineapple Left Behind RETURNS

Hey everyone. Big news.

Remember that time when we launched a Kickstarter for No Pineapple Left Behind and it failed because we didn’t make enough Ottoman Empire jokes?

Well, then. Turns out:

We have made a TON of changes to the game. First off, we replaced ALL of the artwork.





We also added CHILDREN to the game. CHILDREN have a zillion different traits and complex social networks–they are total pains in the ass to deal with.


Other new features:

  • Story Mode. Each school district in the city of New Bellona has a unique problem–if you solve its problem, you take over the school.
  • Schoolbuses that travel through hyperspace gates. 
  • Parents. Parents can heckle you with demands. You can do what they want (difficult) or ignore them (expensive).
  • Supplies. These work with our magic spell system similarly to how gem stones work in ARPGs: add supply such as an Abacus (cheap) or a Calculator (expensive) to a math spell to enhance it. But, they are expensive.
  • Lasers. Teachers can zap children with lasers like “De-friender Bolt” (cheap) or “Anti-Bully Beam” (expensive) in order to directly interact with them.

Too long; didn’t read:* We are funded, have vastly improved the game, and will finish some time towards the end of the year.

*TL;DR for those for whom it really is, and really didn’t

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